just went my blog & read the last entry... erm tot of changing the layout of it.. but lazy.. haha... maybe one day when I really very free & in the mood, then probably will revamp it...
jus came back not long... met him for dinner yesterday & stayed over at his place... since he is playing soccer today so I left in the morning... later meeting Ser to do hair treatment, collect my jeans & window shopping bah.. no money... so sad :( Both Ser & I are broke & in debt.... hai~~~ Despite me having only a small amount left to survive till 30th, I lend him money... I noe many pple will say i stupid again... but I cant bear to see him go hungry.... jus hope he dun take it for granted...
Has a very long tok with him on Thursday... most of the time was me doing the toking... I expressed out everything trying to make him understand but it seems he can never do/change... thats when i noe I have to leave him or bear with it... Saadiah told me its up to me now... for me to make a choice & not him already... well, as expected I am still choosing to be with him... but frankly my feelings for him has decreased... same goes for him.... He likes me but not loves me... Hearing this, of cos am upset & I am so desperate that I went search thro internet to find how to improve relationships... I am trying hard each time to think of ways to improve this relationship....
Each time I kept thinking why the way he treats me now is not like wat its like initally... I wished it will be last time.. but I noe it will not be anymore... cos thats the honeymoon period... If only this period could last forever.... Last nite he asked me to squeeze the pulse behind his ear... its damn big & swollen... the process of he tolerating the pain & me trying to get the pulse out.... I was holding the needle wanting to poke a hole in the pulse... but even before the needle could touch his ear, he went 'ouch'... haha ... its so funny & somehow I have the feeling like as if we were back like last time... I wished such moments will happen more often...
Yesterday nite I suddenly feel like buying PSP.. siao rite?? duno .. jus see so many gers holding the pink PSP.. like very nice leh.. I recently oso nearly bought the samsung Z720.. but cos of him, I decided not to... Phone is secondary, He is primary... Come to think of it.. maybe will not get the PSP also... same reason as the phone... hai~~...
Got to get ready liao.... Byeeeee
